Comments? Ideas? compliments? criticisms?
any feedback appreciated
For the rest of your life...
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- Explorer
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Re: For the rest of your life...
I really enjoyed it. The dialogue was great! Good job!
Only criticism, and this is just my personal preference...I don't like having the first instruction be to edge. I prefer to stroke a few pages to warm up and then edge, but that's just me. Thanks for writing the tease, you did a great job!
Only criticism, and this is just my personal preference...I don't like having the first instruction be to edge. I prefer to stroke a few pages to warm up and then edge, but that's just me. Thanks for writing the tease, you did a great job!
- Sub-Routine
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Re: For the rest of your life...
Hits a very specific kink for me, and does it pretty well. These are my personal favorite kinds of tease and I gave it a good ranking.
Your spelling is pretty decent but some little things: Cap your I's when referring to yourself (or when your fantasy mistress is referring to herself). Ellipsis (...) never have more than 3 periods... You also capitalize a new sentence if it comes after an Ellipsis. If it's "It is" you put an apostrophe in there. If it's "You are" then it's "you're" not "your". Lose is spelled with only one O in most places unless you are loosening something rather than getting rid of it. OK is capitalized on both letters.
The less of these jarring little typos you have, the better the thing flows and the more sexy it becomes. To some, at least.
Your spelling is pretty decent but some little things: Cap your I's when referring to yourself (or when your fantasy mistress is referring to herself). Ellipsis (...) never have more than 3 periods... You also capitalize a new sentence if it comes after an Ellipsis. If it's "It is" you put an apostrophe in there. If it's "You are" then it's "you're" not "your". Lose is spelled with only one O in most places unless you are loosening something rather than getting rid of it. OK is capitalized on both letters.
The less of these jarring little typos you have, the better the thing flows and the more sexy it becomes. To some, at least.
Currently spellchecking 490/490. ^ ^
Re: For the rest of your life...
Awesome awesome awesome! Your spelling and grammer were fine, I didn't even notice anything wrong with it. Its a web-tease, not at thesis paper, put however many ...... you want. It hit my every fantasy please make more!!
Re: For the rest of your life...
Very good one of the best teases I enjoyed doing so far, never even noticed any spelling errors great choice of fantasy woman...
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- Explorer At Heart
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Re: For the rest of your life...
Greta tease. I love the South West Asian women. So very hot. Good story and it flowed well. I hope you are plannig a second part.
SoD
SoD
Not getting what you want is the best part of wanting what you can't get!
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Re: For the rest of your life...
Thanks for the feedback people. I have tried to accomadate them in whatever way i see possible. I have just released the sequel. "For the Rest of you life...- After the Honeymoon"
Feel free to comment here and provide similar feedback.
Thanks
Feel free to comment here and provide similar feedback.
Thanks
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