Chastity & Humiliation Munch TONIGHT March 2nd San Francisco

[AliceInBondageLand]

https://fetlife.com/events/318283

Humiliation Munch: Chastity w/ AliceInBondageLand

Date & Time: Monday, March 02, 2015 · 7:30 PM – 9:30 PM

Location:
Wicked Grounds
289 8th Street, San Francisco, CA

Cost: Free! Just buy a snack to support Wicked Grounds

Dress code: Street-legal, but the venue is kink-friendly. Wear a chastity device if you have one!

Description:

This month, we're talking about chastity, for both males and females. And since this is the humiliation munch, we'll focus on the mental side, on ways to bring the power and denial into your sub's awareness.

Our guest, AliceInBondageLand, will even have some devices to show us from http://www.aliceinbondageland.com

What Is Humiliation?

Embarrassment. Foolishness. Shame. These are common emotions of humiliation.

Humiliation is about power. It's about feeling powerless, or guiding a partner to feel powerless. It activates the body's pain centers, and it's one of the main psychological aspects of kink.

Humiliation can build self-esteem even as it strips power. Being objectified as a beautiful statue, or interrogated (then praised) about sexual fantasies that have never been shared -- great scenes that leave the humiliated feeling better about themselves. Humiliation doesn't have to be degrading, and it usually isn't.

This munch is a great place to learn, gather ideas, and find new, creative ways to embarrass partners in the safe, open environment at our favorite kinky cafe. We'll have a different topic each month, with guest speakers from the the community to share their skills.

[Ms. Julie]

I wish I lived in San Fran

[andy wood]

Alice,

What Is Humiliation?Embarrassment. Foolishness. Shame. These are common emotions of humiliation.

Thanks for sharing this.

I proposed a set of 7 theories of chastity, in ["What do you find arousing about chastity?"]. You had already posted on that thread... but that was before I posted. If you get a chance to read my theories and comment on them, I would welcome your feedback. I am sure you know more than most about that topic. (Though I am curious... everything you posted before, was from your experiences as a domme. Have you ever tried to be in chastity yourself?)

As for humiliation, I am studying that as well, and trying to understand all its varieties, subtypes and nuances. I have one discussion thread already, about a specific type of play that I enjoy ["objectification, humiliation, or something else?"].

Humiliation is about power. It's about feeling powerless, or guiding a partner to feel powerless.

I can definitely relate to this type of humiliation, and I like it both as a sub and as a dom.

It activates the body's pain centers, and it's one of the main psychological aspects of kink.

Just as I am not a big fan of giving or receiving physical pain, the same would go for the mental pain of harsh humiliation.

Humiliation can build self-esteem even as it strips power. Being objectified as a beautiful statue, or interrogated (then praised) about sexual fantasies that have never been shared -- great scenes that leave the humiliated feeling better about themselves. Humiliation doesn't have to be degrading, and it usually isn't.

If you remove the specific references to being a statue, or discussing sexual fantasies, then this sounds like the mental aspect of military boot camp, or the hazing of pledges in a fraternity or sorority. It also sounds like the psychotherapy used to treat phobias.

You have definitely aroused my curiosity. I will search the Forums for good discussions of humiliation... and if I cannot find one that covers all I want to discuss, I will create my own.

[AliceInBondageLand]

I think if we thoroughly surveyed the people that attend the chastity munch we would unearth much more then seven theories of chastity.

Anyone that advocates "one true way" is trying to sell you something.

I spent a year in chastity as part of my training to be a dominant. I believe in never doing someething to someone else that you have not been through yourself, whenever in reason. I don't have balls so cbt is largely theoretical for me.

I believe BDSM to be a powerful passion play that can reach deep levels, similar to boot camp, hazing, team building, religious cults, etc. That is part of why bdsm communities are so close/intimate but also so volatile and prone to drama. I strive to show a safe/sane vision of FUN kinks and not just the scary stuff.

[andy wood]

Alice,

I think if we thoroughly surveyed the people that attend the chastity munch we would unearth much more then seven theories of chastity. Anyone that advocates "one true way" is trying to sell you something.

I am not trying to sell anything, and I am far from an all-knowing expert on chastity. But I do hope that you eventually look over my comments about the 7 types of chastity headspace. If I am missing a few types, I would love to learn more.

I spent a year in chastity as part of my training to be a dominant.

OMG! The longest period I have spent in chastity is about a week. Your year is impressive, and sort of scary.

I believe in never doing someething to someone else that you have not been through yourself, whenever in reason. I don't have balls so cbt is largely theoretical for me.

I do believe that chastity is more difficult for males than for females. Male bodies produce semen, and males can get blue balls. But unless one day a hermaphrodite or intersex person experiences chastity, I doubt it will be possible to do a direct comparison of male chastity vs. female chastity.

I believe BDSM to be a powerful passion play that can reach deep levels, similar to boot camp, hazing, team building, religious cults, etc. That is part of why bdsm communities are so close/intimate but also so volatile and prone to drama.

This fits my observations.

I strive to show a safe/sane vision of FUN kinks and not just the scary stuff.

Good. But from your comments on the Crucifixion Forums thread, I take it you have experienced the scary stuff, too. (Ex. - crucifixion play with actual nails, not just ropes.)

Thank you for your comments on this thread. I will take it as a reminder to work on a Forum thread about types of humiliation.